Shanktified!

When Scrappleface editor Scott Ott decides to step out from behind the “Satire Curtain” it can only be described as chilling. (click here to see what I mean)

My reactions. First, Romney looked presidential (or what I think the American people think a president should look like - why does that even matter). It was a great call to return to the framework the founding fathers had intended. There was/is no separation of church and state in the Constitution. But there is something even conservative and Christian commentators are missing.

Comparing his speech to JFK’s is apples to oranges. Primarily because while we (Catholics and Protestants) have some huge disagreements in our religion. Catholicism is neither a false religion or a cult. Mormonism is, by definition, a cult where you can obtain Godship for yourself. God (according to Mitt Romney’s faith) was once a man who through his own goodness has become a god. I realize calling Mormonism or the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints a cult may be offensive to those in “the church.” But see for yourself. Joseph Smith failed in his predictions of the return of Christ and many other “Thus says the Lord” prophesies. He was, by definition, a false prophet. Again, I am not trying to offend. Just pointing out what commentators are missing.

Along those same lines, Romney said, “There is one fundamental question about which I often am asked. What do I believe about Jesus Christ? I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and the Savior of mankind.”

Don’t be fooled by Mormon word-theft and hair gel!

Here’s what he really means [my comments in brackets]:

There is one fundamental question about which I often am asked [but never answer]. What do I [ok - well, Mormons] believe about Jesus Christ? I [avoiding the term Mormons] believe that Jesus [first born spirit of Heaven and Satan’s older brother] Christ [not in the full atonement way] is the [physically conceived (iow: God and Mary had sex)] Son of God [also once a man from another planet, but now perfect and ruler of this universe, from the planet Kolob*] and the Savior [at least if you can’t do it yourself, or no one prays you in after you are dead] of mankind.

[PS: this speech should make me a shoe in toward becoming my own God].

Look Mitt, just be honest and say, “You bet I’ll make a good president, I’m working my way up to ruler of my own universe - so I got a lot riding on this!”

Seriously, I will not vote for someone who belongs to a cult. Does that make me a bigot? Of course not. We should not give credence and a platform to any false religion. I also wont be voting for Jose Luis de Jesus Miranda or any member of the Branch Davidians, either.

* I swear, I am not making that Kolob part up!!!

This link has more than you ever wanted to know about springing forward and falling back.  Why do we still practice Daylight Savings Time?  Short answer It seems studies suggest it saves us money.

BTW: This weekend we set our clocks back. Unless your my VCR, which automatically did it a month ago.

You Sneeze, You’re Dead Man

That should be on his security sign out front.

CNN.com gushes how DICTATOR Hugo Chavez is trying to rid his country of alchohol.  Ask your self.  If this were Jerry Falwell proclaiming the evils of wiskey how would they protray him?  Bah!!!!

washingtonpost.com reports sightings of “Robobugs” at an antiwar rally in Lafayette Square last month.

“I heard someone say, ‘Oh my [blasphemy removed], look at those,’ ” the college senior from New York recalled. “I look up and I’m like, ‘What the hell is that?’ They looked kind of like dragonflies or little helicopters. But I mean, those are not insects.”

Out in the crowd, Bernard Crane saw them, too. “I’d never seen anything like it in my life,” the Washington lawyer said. “They were large for dragonflies. I thought, ‘Is that mechanical, or is that alive?’ “

Who needs black-helicopters?

CNN.com reports, “The U.S. Air Force won the Ig Nobel Peace Prize this year for its proposal to develop a “gay bomb” — a chemical weapon that would make enemy soldiers want to make love with each other, not war with the enemy.”

Does that mean you are not born that way?

The debate over whether Creationism and Evolutionary Theory should be taught in schools has been raging for some time, therefore it is a political issue; and an important one for most conservatives. Those in office should have done the math (or should i say science) but my guess is most have not and just jumped on the “don’t argue with science.” bandwagon. I would have liked to have an “undecided” or “who hasn’t done their homework” show of hands. Regardless of the theology involved, it is a clear example of states rights and the role of the federal government within the local school districts.

Where someone stands on origins also matters because it typically defines their social policies.

For instance, the more you see someone “made in the image of God”, there more you should see the worth of that child or adult; regardless of their benefit to society.

On the other hand, the more you see us as something that “randomly mutated from fish” the more you are going to see all life (human and non-human) as expendable, or as some people having more worth than others who may be “less beneficial” to society.

So yeah, it matters.   I just wish I could ask each candidate a follow up:

Why do you or do you not believe in evolution?   Because there is where you would get some real insight.

Incidentally, Darwin’s Theory is still just that.— THEORY.

“There are gaps in the fossil graveyard, places where there should be intermediate forms, but where there is nothing whatsoever instead. No paleontologist . . . denies that this is so. It is simply a fact. Darwin’s theory and the fossil record are in conflict.” David Berlinski, Ph. D.

Here comes the biodegradable fork
Scheer, CEO of Santa Monica, Calif.-based Cereplast, says his company has come up with a way to produce things like forks, knives, cups, food packages and other items out of plastic derived from cornstarch, rather than from petroleum-based compounds.

I’ll admit, this is slightly better than my “eatable-fork-made-from-unused-fortune-cookies” idea.

Make up your mind kids:

A prominent Iranian newspaper said Tuesday it would hold a competition for cartoons on the Holocaust to test whether the West extends the principle of freedom of expression [blah blah blah]

Didn’t Iran just declare there wasn’t any holocaust?