Shanktified!

The personal thoughts, opinions and typos of Ron Shank

Top Ten Reasons I Never Bathe

by Leave a Comment

  1. I was forced to as a child.
  2. People who bathe are hypocrites – they think they are cleaner than everybody else.
  3. There are so many different kinds of soap, I can’t decide which one is best.
  4. I used to bathe, but I got bored and stopped.
  5. I bathe only on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.
  6. None of my friends bathe.
  7. I’ll start bathing when I get older and dirtier.
  8. I can’t spare the time.
  9. The bathroom is never warm enough in winter or cool enough in summer.
  10. People who make soap are only after your money.

Author: unknown

Answering JP

by 10 Comments

This post is an answer to a comment by JP on the ever popular Ron Paul on Evolution post. His post was so long the reply needs it’s own post. I’ve tried to keep my replies brief, but if that lead to me being less than clear on something, please ask in the comments. And before I begin, let me thank you, JP, for the well thought out comment and the “let us reason together” attitude you bring to the table. It’s refreshing. Okay, here we go:

[Read more…] about Answering JP

Mitt Romney’s Faith Speech – What the commentators are missing

by 10 Comments

Mitt Romney Faith SpeechMy reactions. First, Romney looked presidential (or what I think the American people think a president should look like – why does that even matter). It was a great call to return to the framework the founding fathers had intended. There was/is no separation of church and state in the Constitution. But there is something even conservative and Christian commentators are missing.

Comparing his speech to JFK’s is apples to oranges. Primarily because while we (Catholics and Protestants) have some huge disagreements in our religion. Catholicism is neither a false religion or a cult. Mormonism is, by definition, a cult where you can obtain Godship for yourself. God (according to Mitt Romney’s faith) was once a man who through his own goodness has become a god. I realize calling Mormonism or the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints a cult may be offensive to those in “the church.” But see for yourself. Joseph Smith failed in his predictions of the return of Christ and many other “Thus says the Lord” prophesies. He was, by definition, a false prophet. Again, I am not trying to offend. Just pointing out what commentators are missing.

Along those same lines, Romney said, “There is one fundamental question about which I often am asked. What do I believe about Jesus Christ? I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and the Savior of mankind.”

Don’t be fooled by Mormon word-theft and hair gel!

Here’s what he really means [my comments in brackets]:

There is one fundamental question about which I often am asked [but never answer]. What do I [ok – well, Mormons] believe about Jesus Christ? I [avoiding the term Mormons] believe that Jesus [first born spirit of Heaven and Satan’s older brother] Christ [not in the full atonement way] is the [physically conceived (iow: God and Mary had sex)] Son of God [also once a man from another planet, but now perfect and ruler of this universe, from the planet Kolob*] and the Savior [at least if you can’t do it yourself, or no one prays you in after you are dead] of mankind.

[PS: this speech should make me a shoe in toward becoming my own God].

Look Mitt, just be honest and say, “You bet I’ll make a good president, I’m working my way up to ruler of my own universe – so I got a lot riding on this!”

Seriously, I will not vote for someone who belongs to a cult. Does that make me a bigot? Of course not. We should not give credence and a platform to any false religion. I also wont be voting for Jose Luis de Jesus Miranda or any member of the Branch Davidians, either.

* I swear, I am not making that Kolob part up!!!