Top Ten Reasons I Never Bathe

  1. I was forced to as a child.
  2. People who bathe are hypocrites – they think they are cleaner than everybody else.
  3. There are so many different kinds of soap, I can’t decide which one is best.
  4. I used to bathe, but I got bored and stopped.
  5. I bathe only on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.
  6. None of my friends bathe.
  7. I’ll start bathing when I get older and dirtier.
  8. I can’t spare the time.
  9. The bathroom is never warm enough in winter or cool enough in summer.
  10. People who make soap are only after your money.

Author: unknown